at what age can i choose how to live? In Death, We Dance's Journal

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In Death, We Dance's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
In Death, We Dance

[ website | A listening ear ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

(4 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

ATTN: everyone [01 Jan 2003|02:30pm]
hello everyone.
i'd just like to inform you that if you'd like to stay livejournal buddies with me, i've made a new journal. The new name is...

Earl's New Journal

update your friends list if you wish
happy new year

(4 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[01 Jan 2003|04:03am]
...and that is when you begin to wonder if someone else in this world could actually feel the way you feel about other people, if someone could actually miss you while you're away, if people could actually feel the way you always feel for them. do people sometimes really feel that way about me? i never see why.

P.S- does ANYONE have a code they can give me? it would be greatly appreciated

(2 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[30 Dec 2002|01:49pm]
forgotten admirations make the past seem like bliss, always luring me back to all the times when i could lose myself in your eyes. I guess nostalgia was aiming to become the best of friends with me, because all i can remember is the way you used to smell and how i'd forgotten all the times when heaven couldn't compare to what we had when our lips would lock. I guess, to say the least, i miss those days with every ounce of my soul. I'd never felt such a complete and true happiness. I'm sorry.

(10 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[27 Dec 2002|03:05am]
dear diary

For weeks and weeks now it seems that this writers block has plagued my brain when it tries to create, my heart when it tries to bleed, and my hands when they try to write. I can't seem to shake it, and it's become so heavy that it's discouraging. The absence has turned into insecurity, leaving me with little or no motivation. Pray tell, what am I to do now that I lack creative vision, when creative vision is the thing I cherish most about myself? Maybe this time I can credit the inspiration this time to the intelligence of someone who knows not the gift they personally possess. Their ability and knowledge makes me want to create, to express, to write. I guess I just admire their abilities. Weird I guess. I'm sure they would not know of who I speak by reading this, but if they so should inquire, and if they too are they one of whom I speak, then I would tell them that their gift has the power to inspire others, using myself as an example. Maybe to make them understand their own sheer brilliance.

(3 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

quiet and still [24 Dec 2002|05:29pm]
...and there's a dark empty hole
the thought of you will fill
the thought of you will fill
the thought of you will fill
the thought of you will fill

(8 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[22 Dec 2002|02:24pm]
so let's say you had a boyfriend/girlfriend for a couple of years, and for that couple of years, you've have not seen the friends you used to hang out with all the time. not once. wouldn't you start to feel bad? or something? even a little bit? god damn

(3 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[21 Dec 2002|02:59pm]
you are a waste of human life and space
i hope a bus hits you
and you die
i will come to your funeral
and deface your coffin and grave site
you think you're slick
go play in traffic

(3 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[21 Dec 2002|02:03pm]
yet another layout is the best
this is just until i scan my drop dead lp
and use that

(2 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[19 Dec 2002|07:57pm]
people before profits

(2 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

new journal layout [16 Dec 2002|01:31am]
new layout, ho ho ho

(9 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

a day at the job [15 Dec 2002|12:58am]

(3 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

quote of the day [13 Dec 2002|02:15pm]
"I ain't draft dodging. I ain't burning no flag. I ain't running to Canada. I'm staying right here. You want to send me to jail? Fine, you go right ahead. I've been in jail for 400 years. I could be there for 4 or 5 more, but I ain't going no 10,000 miles to help murder and kill other poor people. If I want to die, I'll die right here, right now, fightin' you, if I want to die. You my enemy, not no Chinese, no Vietcong, no Japanese. You my opposer when I want freedom. You my opposer when I want justice. You my opposer when I want equality. Want me to go somewhere and fight for you? You won't even stand up for me right here in America, for my rights and my religious beliefs. You won't even stand up for my right here at home."

-Muhammad Ali

(7 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[12 Dec 2002|02:24am]
i've come to the realization that i have a huge crush on tara reid.
god damn

(feelin' lucky?)

[11 Dec 2002|02:27am]
this christmas
go out and buy the King Crimson cd entitled "In the Court of the Crimson King"
either for yourself or a loved one
it's simply one of the most amazing albums ever made
sheer brilliance

(1 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[11 Dec 2002|01:22am]
cigarettes = bad for you?
bad for our culture?

new Truth commercial sparked my interest.

"according to a recently uncovered document, a well-known tobacco company planned on boosting sales of cigarettes in the mid-90's by specifically tageting gays and homeless people. what did they call the little plan? Project subculture urban marketing, also known as 'project scum.' but i'm sure they ment that in a good way."

open your eyes fuckers.

(feelin' lucky?)

[10 Dec 2002|12:52pm]
this year's award for best livejournal comment goes to torie

on a side note
i'm excited for this weekend
and christmas
and the days after christmas
oh, and
it doesn't matter who you like
because we don't care

(5 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[09 Dec 2002|04:00pm]
i remember when my cristmas list would be so long
and i still got presents i didn't ask for
i remember when our two-car garage fit
our two-car status
i remember when this time of the year
wasn't so hard for us
there are those who are less fortunate
just keep that in mind, Earl.

(5 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[09 Dec 2002|04:24am]
[ mood | calm ]

in light of my recent state of mind, i've decided to take this time to ramble on about absolutely nothing that has any relevence to anyone who may choose to read this, but then again, that's the purpose this journal serves.

i think one day i might have thoughts of buying a gun. I also think that if i were to purchase a gun, i would shoot too many people, so maybe that wouldn't be such a good idea. i'm glad it's winter. i'm glad it's christmastime. I'm glad it's the time to recognize what we have and how lucky a lot of us are. it's almost sad that it has to resort to the holiday season for most of this population to realize the suffering and poverty of their own nation. But what am I to do...i've noticed that lately a lot of creativity is springing out of my brain, but I never seem to embrace ideas i get and create something. i want to write a novel. but i probably won't because i'm absent-minded to brainstorm ideas for it. it's fun to watch people. the behavior of people. i've reached a point where i have the comfort in knowing i'm important enough for people to spend energy trying to break me down, more energy than i spend living my OWN life. wow. how many lives can one person affect. i'm tired of useless people. i still haven't gotten around to listening to my kill sadie 7". i'll do that soon. should stop feeling sorry for yourself. your phase will end, and you will still be empty-handed, and no one will remember your face. i drew a picture for 90 minutes. 90 minutes of solid concentration. maybe i've reached a junction in my life where i read into things and people's personalities just turn me off all the time. i'm glad i'm not enrolled in public school right now. i think the administration of the high school are the masterminds behind some cloning scheme. throw on your favorite bright eyes record and get your pack of smokes ready because the talent agency is one the way to scoop you up and take you to my chimney so i can defecate on your face. i think i'm going to break off a lot of communication with certain people for a while, mainly because i just won't feel like talking to you. the vague "you"'s used here are in reference to a amount of people uncertain by yours truly, but i have a couple in mind. i guess it's time for sleep.

eat shit


(2 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[07 Dec 2002|04:03pm]
if i'm so far from your heart
why do i feel it beat

ps - bring it

(6 ate shit | feelin' lucky?)

[05 Dec 2002|12:40pm]
so i had this dream...

i was in seattle with a couple friends, and we were walking out from a mall and past a little strip mall to go home because it was late, and we walked by this big wall and cop cars were pulling up and there was some kind of gun fight and so we all freaked out because we were afraid we would get shot, so we ran away and my friends found a place to hide and they jumped down into this little place, but i saw some guys legs before i went down there, so i was scared, and when i went down, he just looked at me and shot me in the chest. then i "woke up" and i was at some place trying to fix a car with my parents and some other people, and i just had a huge bloody gaping hole in my chest, and i told everyone i got shot. no one really cared.
the end

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